September

 

september

 

My favorite part of the year begins. The days when I remember so clearly how it felt to be in third grade. Regretting the end of the long and carefree days, of sleeping in and having no plans, but also anxiously waiting for what the new school year has in store for me. Missing the feeling of being so safe at my desk, in my classroom, with all my friends, and looking forward to be there again. It’s just for a few days, at the beginning of September, when this mirror into the past opens for me and there I am, thirty years ago, waiting for the new school year to start.

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Psychology and the Cosmos

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I found this book on my grandparents’ bookshelf. I never read it as a child and I don’ t remember its cover, probably it used to be in the back rows of the shelves. It was written by Iuri Gagarin and Vladimir Lebedev (a medical doctor and a specialist in space psychology, as it is written on the back cover). A note from the translator tells us that Gagarin finished this book on the 25th of March 1968, a day before his death.

I read this book hoping it will contain all the wonder and hope that was associated with space travel in my childhood. The chapters go through all the things that used to make me daydream: the immensity and silence of the Cosmos, imponderability, time perception, the friendship and trust among the crew that goes out in space, the shining stars that  seem closer from up there.

But also the book is a long stream of anecdotes, some historical, about explorers of other unknown and lonely territories like Antarctica, some contemporary about their friends and colleagues, other cosmonauts, these stories being by far more interesting. A long stream of these stories, scientific facts explained very simply, quotes from Kant and Lenin, speculations about the future of time travel, description of the soviet man written in empty propaganda language. A lot of talk about “manliness” that is necessary for conquering the outer space, for winning the ” duel with nature”. A lot of really disheartening and so so sad references to experiments on animals, but I didn’t’ read those passages and pages. One wildly rude mention of some unnamed tribes in Africa and one “Indian” ( was it someone from India? from America?) who irrationally believe in the reality of dreams.

Among all these, the smiling faces of the first cosmonauts, photos of the crafts they made in the isolated rooms where they were practicing the silence and loneliness of Cosmos, pages about imponderability that I used to obsess about as a child, being sure that I will experience it myself someday. And by far the  most interesting thing in the book, accounts of cosmonauts who have first seen the blue and violet haze at the curb of the Earth, who have seen the sun in Cosmos with its blinding light, who traveled inside a burning knot while their space craft was entering the atmosphere. The reports the cosmonauts wrote in a clear and simple language shinning with an eerie beauty.

I searched for Tereshkova in the book. She is mentioned a few times. There is a story about her wedding. There is mentioned that, while male cosmonauts were chosen from among pilots, women who didn’t have any former flight experience had to train more. She appears once more towards the end of the book as a kind and motherly colleague, comforting the worried Lebedev before he jumps with a parachute for the first time. He calls her Valia. There is also a photo of her in space.

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I read this book together with my child double, trying to imagine what she would have felt or thought reading it. She would have shivered the same way as me at the pages about animals and she would have rushed trough them. She wouldn’t have noticed that all the attributes necessary to be a cosmonaut are written in male form. She would have thought that in the distant future of her adult years space travel will be available to anyone (as a poem in the book titled “We will live to see it” promises). She would have nodded approvingly to the description of the beauty of life in communism.

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I tried to read this book with her and remember her hopes now when the world is so bleak. Reading about space travel now is reading about the same issues: going to Mars, sending out long term manned missions to distant places of our star system and beyond, creating the ecosystems inside these ships, dealing with the psychological aspects of such travels, etc. But the hope and the wonder is completely gone now, when people compete to receive a one-way ticket to Mars in order to be in a reality show, when space exploration missions are private ventures based on the commons of knowledge acquired in the sixties and seventies and often funded by public money, when the colonization of space is in direct connection to the necessity of leaving behind our dying planet in order to go somewhere where even the air you breath would be a commodity.

I used to love looking at these kind of photos, at his smiling face while the water from his cup is floating in front of him. IMG_8733a

1951

I have found this chocolate tin at an antique fair. It is Romanian, from 1951 (the factories used to mark the year of production on tins). It’s in such a perfect condition for its age (usually these boxes have rust on the inside or outside). And the characters on the box, even if it was produced 30 years before my childhood, are so familiar, so very much the same as the characters from my own books and toys.

The sea

…I would want to be there, in that drawing, instead of being here, in my busy days. This child cotton scarf was brought back from the seaside by my grandmother in 1960. It has written all around names of Romanian seaside resorts. I wasn’t able to clean all of those rust stains, but I like it anyway. IMG_6570mic

2 years

It’s my blog anniversary today. I still enjoy posting here even if I don’t manage to do it so often.

These weird Christmas cards are from my childhood collection, from the eighties. The faceless Santa is really creepy and I also think the faceless child in the left is nice, too :).

I clearly remember the pink fluffy doll the child holds in the second card. I didn’t have one like it but many of my friends did. I also appreciate the very typical carpet in socialist homes and how the card was badly printed, with a lighter stripe in the left. So funny and also so nostalgic.

We have a peaceful day, it’s snowing outside, we have lots of delicious vegan food and the dogs are really happy that we are all at home.

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My birthday gifts

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My birthday was 10 days ago, but I was so busy these days and I neglected my blog. I took a sick day today, in order to heal from a flue, that kept nagging me for some time now. So, I have found the time to take pictures of some of my birthday presents, of the hand made, vintage and second hand ones, my favorite kind of presents.

My friend Rodica made me these beautiful bags. The bigger one is from an interesting fabric that looks like paper.

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img_4926She also made me the white blouse in this photo. The vintage Japanese yellow cardigan is also a gift from her, but form last year.

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This beautiful fancy dress is also made by Rodica, initially for her sister who wore it for some special occasions. But her sister decided to give it to me, as I usually wear fancy dresses with cardigans and such in informal situations, too. I was very glad to receive it. img_5018img_4938

My friend Maria gave me a ring for my figural jewelry collection. Also, she transformed for me a nineties troll doll without any hair or clothing. She made the hair out of a mineral and she created for the doll a cosmic dress :). She never liked troll dolls but I like them a lot, so she spend a good deal of time on it :). IMG_5026.JPG

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Also, she transformed the cover of a notebook that I used to have since a long time ago, but I didn’t want to use it as I was embarrassed by the colonialist map on its cover. This transformation deserves its own post, in details. IMG_5001.JPG

My favorite coworker gave me this set of geometric shapes used by teachers in the eighties. I wanted such a set for a very long time, but it is kind of expensive to buy online and I have never found it at the flea market. I was very happy to finally have them! They were produced in a factory from the town I grew up in. IMG_4954.JPGAnother coworker gave me also a beautiful gift of a book she illustrated,  a tasty syrup and this soap she had made herself and wrapped in a doily. IMG_4944.JPG

Oti found at a second hand shop this cute t-shirt. IMG_4942.JPG

And the kids at school gave me these flowers that we have planted in our urban garden. IMG_5771.JPG

It wasn’t only my birthday last week. Our dog Cici was born sometimes in October, this is the time frame our vet estimated. So, he put down in her id the same birthday as mine. We had celebrated together :).  dscn9846dscn9848dscn9849dscn9844

Back to school

School started a week and a half ago, but only these last two days began to feel like autumn. Cold, rainy and windy and so nostalgic, with the mix of regret for the lost freedom of the summer vacation and the joy of new beginnings, the mix of worries for re-found responsibilities and comfort of meeting your colleagues again.I really enjoy this time of the year and this old familiar feeling which is even nicer this school year. My childhood friend, with whom we went to school together, brings her daughter every morning to the school I teach at. So, we get to meet on the hallways again and spend some time together before the first class starts, same as many, many years ago. And same as then, in our secondary school times, we call each other in the afternoons too , to talk some more.

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